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How to Listen

Learn to Know What to Listen To When

Do you know how to listen? Most people think they are good listeners. They aren't. Watch Doug explain why in this short video.

Listening is a skill that must be developed and mastered. Powerful listening is counter-intuitive which means that you will not pick up the skill on your own. You have to be taught how to listen. In his keynotes and workshops on listening, Doug takes you through the four levels of reflective listening:

  • Mirroring
  • Paraphrasing
  • Core Messaging
  • Affect Labeling

Mirroring and paraphrasing rely on words. If information transfer and absolute clarity of semantic meaning is important, use these types of reflective listening. Core messaging requires the listener to grasp the essence of what a speaker is trying to say and state the core message. The best core message is a metaphor. Use core messaging when the speaker is rambling, confused, or disjointed. Affect labeling requires the listener to ignore the words completely and focus only on the emotions of the speaker. The listener's only response to the spaerk will be to state the emotions the speaker is experiencing in the moment. Affect labeling is the most effective way to de-escalate strong emotions quickly and efficiently.





Doug has taught thousands of people how to listen. His techniques and talks have changed lives.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for teaching us about affect labeling.  My husband, a physician,
helped me with some of Lieberman's articles last night. And, despite your cautions, we practiced on
each other.  After being married for over 25 years, we learned things about each other!

Doug's keynotes and workshops teach you how to listen in all four levels. He helps you re-program your brain with his use of tai chi exercises. His talks and workshops on how to listen are interactive and eye-opening.

Engage Doug to inspire and teach you how to listen. You may also want to visit Doug's online course on how to listen